Is it a sex blog? A mommy blog? A bitch & moan blog? Um, . . . yeah. This is my place to be totally honest. In my real life, I feel like I'm always lying to somebody about something. Here, I am totally honest. Brutally so. However, no matter what bad things I say about my kids, I adore them and would never ever really, say, sell them on Ebay. The husband, often referred to as Spousehole, is another story. Oh yeah - if you are under 18 (or if you are my husband), please leave now.

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Truth or Dare!


Truth: What is the most embarrassing thing you have done/have happened during sex?

Well there was this one time, at band camp . . .

Okay, not really. It took place right here in this house. It was before we had kids, back when Spousehole and I partook of the hot monkey love on a regular (some might say, obsessive) basis. We were going at it, hot and heavy, when I attained the pinnacle of sexual pleasure (orgasm, okay?) Right in the middle of it, with Spousehole pounding away at me, I passed gas. Loudly. Not smelly or anything, but not something one could really ignore either. It sounded like the air brakes on a school bus - pshoooo. Spousehole laughed his ass off and it was several minutes before he could resume and finish because he was laughing too hard.

Bonus embarrassing thing - I 've told this before, but here it is again:
When we had been married about 8 months, my husband and I had spent a long weekend at my parents' house. There was never really any privacy there, so we were anxious to get busy when we got home. Undressing as we went up the stairs, kissing hungrily, hands everywhere - you get the idea. The sex was athletic, acrobatic, and, ultimately, dangerous. I moved forward as he moved in to kiss me and WHAM! My forehead, his nose. Blood everywhere, nose crooked. We ended up spending the next few hours in the emergency room. It was broken, but good. Every nurse, doctor, or aide started off by asking, "How did this happen?" By the end of the night we thought it was pretty funny. He still likes to tell people how I broke his nose. Including my parents and our pastor.

16 comments:

G-Man said...

Flatulent, bleeding Bunny!

I always LOVE your openess...You so funny!
xox

Renee said...

Farting was one of my embarrassing things too. Oh goodness, air brakes! *giggle*

I've had more than my share of embarrassing things happen, but have never broken anything. Well, other than furniture. ;)

Great to have you playing ToD!

The Troll said...

Grrrherhahahhahahahaha. I wonder if there's a culture where farting during sex is considered good?

Pluff said...

I'm still cracking up at the "sound effect"!!

Great answer! Thanks for playing!!

P

Anonymous said...

My most embarrassing sex story?
I always wanted to try anal, but my husband bought cinnamon flavored lube......I ran around the room screaming and holding my ass like some idiot!! I used a whole box of Prep. H. wipes all weekend long.

Second most embarrassing: I lost my virginity at church camp. In the chapel. With the maintenance man who was 14 years older.

BB t Q o MM

Samantha said...

LOL Air Breaks!!! the 'bonus' was priceless lol great answers! Have a wonderful day!

Desmond Jones said...

Well, I probably shouldn't mention the time that Molly, uh, 'broke wind' whilst we were 69ing. 'Cuz that would be like 'telling tales out of school', wouldn't it?

And besides, the whole 'farting' thing has already been done here, right?

So maybe I should rather mention the time she was, shall we say, 'playing with my toy' in the car, and a passing trucker air-horned his appreciation. . .

Craze said...

I'm going to knock on wood now, otherwise I'll be telling a farting story next week.

Flyinfox_SATX said...

ROTFLMAO! Thanks for sharing this bunny.

Flyinfox_SATX

Stratocast said...

I love both of these stories!

Vixen said...

*blush*

;)

lime said...

that is some kinda rough sex if it resulted in a broken nose! too funny!

Peggy said...

oh, lord... talk about farting....

i'll be waiting for your HNT, bunnykins!

Amorous Rocker said...

Hahaha!!

Both stories were so funny. Thanks for sharing! I wanted to share a second story for my ToD but I couldn't think of anything, lol.

HMS28 said...

That is embarrassing thing,but in the pincle of sexual pleasure is no bad jejeje, the gas, passed wind on his boll. jajaja.
very fan.

{Ãñgê£}ä said...

That first story takes the cake on embarassing, but your husband bragging about the nature of his injury to parents and pastor? Hiarious!

Thanks for stopping by with some advice! I have gone to the mall playland a few times to get a break in the past, but there are always so many people there! I need an alone time break sometimes!

Happy Mother's Day! :)