Is it a sex blog? A mommy blog? A bitch & moan blog? Um, . . . yeah. This is my place to be totally honest. In my real life, I feel like I'm always lying to somebody about something. Here, I am totally honest. Brutally so. However, no matter what bad things I say about my kids, I adore them and would never ever really, say, sell them on Ebay. The husband, often referred to as Spousehole, is another story. Oh yeah - if you are under 18 (or if you are my husband), please leave now.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Not Feeling the Love Today






Yep, I'll kick your ass right now, for very little to no reason at all.



And then I'll cry. And cry some more. An email (that wasn't even that mean or anything) made me bawl my eyes out this morning and since then I keep crying intermittently. Not just about the email, that was just the initial reason to cry. I'm feeling fat, ugly, stupid, unlovable, rejected and just plain awful. Give me a topic, I'll tell you all the bad things about myself related to that topic. It's just that kind of day. Gawd, I hate being hormonal.

Maybe it's better if I just stay away from people for a while, until I go pick up my kids this afternoon. I miss them, of course, but part of me doesn't even want to go pick them up. They deserve better than me, the world's suckiest de facto single mom. I'm not feeling fit to interact with others. Fuck.

19 comments:

Brian Gardes said...

Hey Bunny. I'm really sorry. I'm sending you a little love and good thoughts right now.

Osbasso said...

pfftttt...

G-Man said...

Confused Bunny...?
You are none of those things you describe..
You are beautiful, talented, sexy, and a wonderful mother!!
(((BIGHUG)))

The Phosgene Kid said...

Don't be so hard on yourself. Do hope you are feeling better.

Old Knudsen said...

fat, ugly, stupid, unlovable, rejected and just plain awful

Look on the bright side, I'd still do you.

Bob said...

Well, we all have days like this. Some better than yours some worse. My track coach used to tell me to walk it off when I got a leg cramp. Far from your cramps, but you might want to try to walk it off, get outside, be with people, lock your kids in the closet so you don't worry while you're out, kind of day. A night's sleep may do wonders. Hope Monday is a happier day for you Bunny.

sandy shoes said...

This, too, shall pass. Soon, I hope...

Trueself said...

Oh Bunny, I so understand all those feelings. I've been there myself way too many times. I find that I just repeat a mantra over and over during those times -- "Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you." Not sure it makes me feel better, but it kind of keeps people at bay.

Polt said...

I love you anyway, snookums.

HUGS....

exile said...

awwwwww, poor wittle wabbit

i'd so give you a sympathy ass smack

then an empathy ass smack

then a "just for the hell of it" ass smack

and if that didn't help, then the beating would continue until moral improved *big hugs*

Johanne said...

It happens once in while... to all of us... ;-((
Wish you are already feeling better!!

Anonymous said...

BTDR, vodka helps.

(But I don't really think you are any of those things you described!)

The Creeper said...

I'd hug ya, but I'm almost afraid to. I hate days like that. Hate them. Hope your mood is lighter soon.

Karen said...

I thought I would drop over to see if you had done a Mute Monday post. I'd offer you a hug too but Lizzie Borden was a nasty ass gal and I'se too scared to come close :( Hope it passes soon. Bloody hormones have a lot to answer for.

Gnomeself Be True said...

Don't mess with puss behind the wheel!

I've seen this sort of thing before, and personally, I wouldn't hug you without an asbestos suit and chain mail on.

I do hope you are better soon though... ;-)

ME said...

Oh girl, I'm sending you tons of hugs. Sorry you're feeling so down. And for the record, you are a great person and a great mom and your kids are lucky to have you.

Desmond Jones said...

(keeping head down, trying not to attract attention. . .)

Vixen said...

Aww Bunny. :( That was me last week. Hang in there chickie. *HUGS*

SheenV said...

{{Hugs}}