Is it a sex blog? A mommy blog? A bitch & moan blog? Um, . . . yeah. This is my place to be totally honest. In my real life, I feel like I'm always lying to somebody about something. Here, I am totally honest. Brutally so. However, no matter what bad things I say about my kids, I adore them and would never ever really, say, sell them on Ebay. The husband, often referred to as Spousehole, is another story. Oh yeah - if you are under 18 (or if you are my husband), please leave now.

Saturday, February 2, 2008

And the Poop Continues . . .

Will this never end?

My son had his 7-year check-up yesterday. In addition to getting a referral to a behavioral psychiatrist, the doctor wants to have some labs done on his (Boy's) bowel movements. Guess whose job it is to collect three containers of "specimen," seal the jars in hazardous material envelopes, and keep them IN HER FRIDGE until they can be delivered to the lab?

If you guessed me, YOU WIN!

And the cat pooped on the floor in the downstairs bathroom, just to cap off a lovely morning.

Our pediatrician rocks though. She saves articles for me, really listens, and wears cool clothes. She had on cream-colored fishnet stockings yesterday. Spousehole found this off-putting, however. "I don't think fishnets are really appropriate for a pediatrician" blah blah blah. She had on slacks - you only got a glimpse of the fishnets. Sheeez. I like her a lot. She's a mom too and she totally gets where I'm coming from.
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Edit 11:05 a.m.: Spousehole once again demonstrated some excellent parenting skills at the doctor yesterday. He was able to gently convince Boy to be weighed, measured, and take the eye exam. Then Boy had to have a Varivax booster (chicken pox vaccine). He has not handled shots well in the past. It took four people to give his flu shot last year - three to hold him, one to jab him. Yesterday Spousehole asked the nurse to bring an empty syringe when she brought Boy's shot. She then wiped Spousehole's arm, "gave him a shot" (no needle in the syringe), and put a Band-Aid on the spot, while Spousehole explained the whole procedure to Boy. Boy was still apprehensive and Spousehole had to hold Boy's free arm, but he tolerated it well. He yelled when he was poked. He cried for about 3 seconds, then stopped cold and just looked at the Band-Aid on his arm. He smiled at the Band-Aid and said "Okay, all done." He was happy to get his sticker at check-out and was fine after that. You wouldn't have known it was the same kid from the flu shot incident last year.

Now if Spousehole could translate these skills for everyday use . . .

11 comments:

Zoely said...

o for pete's sake. i dunno if i could do that poop duty. hats off to you.

Z said...

You are lucky in your pediatrician... and it strikes me Spousehole doesn't know how to appreciate a good thing when he sees it. You're having a tough time at the moment, but I always admire your optimism and courage. Kisses.

Chuck said...

I'm curious about your son's poop problems. My seven year old has had some as well. Have you ever written more in detail about it? Maybe I'll scan the archives and see if I can find out...

Em said...

I could probably collect it...and put it in a container. But I'm not entirely sure I could ever eat anything from that fridge again.

Trueself said...

I'm afraid I'd have to have a whole different fridge for poop storage. On the other hand, given the weather here lately I might just set it out on the back porch.

Spousehole needs to seriously chill. Seriously. . .

Brian said...

Glad to hear that your pediatrician is so helpful. That is sooooo important. Our pediatrician has been incredibly helpful over the years. She has helped calm me and my wife down and relax over issues along the way. Glad to hear that you have a sympathetic and knowledgeable ear about your son

The Troll said...

I'm willing to bet you and the spousehole wind up staying together if someone gives me decent odds. Or that you get back together at some point.

George said...

WOW, on all fronts from poop filled bags in the fridge, to poop on the bathroom floor to spousehole ... funny how I managed to fit spousehole in with the rest of the crap

Polt said...

oh man...I hate dealing with my OWN poop, can't imagine having to deal with anyone else's....

HUGS...

blondenotstupid said...

It's not that bad, really. I had to do it once. I made sure that I wiped the jars down with alcohol and then into sealed plastic bags before putting them in the fridge.

I'm thinking there are some lessons in Spousehole's relative calm moments with Boy. It seems that if you can show Boy what's going to happen and explain it to him, he's fine. Just gotta take those extra few minutes.

Vixen said...

You rock. It's amazing what we do as moms and pet owners....*sigh*