Is it a sex blog? A mommy blog? A bitch & moan blog? Um, . . . yeah. This is my place to be totally honest. In my real life, I feel like I'm always lying to somebody about something. Here, I am totally honest. Brutally so. However, no matter what bad things I say about my kids, I adore them and would never ever really, say, sell them on Ebay. The husband, often referred to as Spousehole, is another story. Oh yeah - if you are under 18 (or if you are my husband), please leave now.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Over the River and Through the Woods

Merry Christmas everyone!!

I hope this day finds you warmly ensconced with family and/or friends, enjoying the peace of the season.

Me? Not so much. At least not yet.

I'm writing this from the "business center" of a Comfort Inn in Michigan. We left South Carolina Tuesday night after my husband got home from work. We stayed in Asheville, N.C. that night and then left Wednesday morning for Michigan. I drove about 7 hours and he drove about 6 hours, yet we are still not to my parents' house. Arggh!

Michigan had a warm-up on Wednesday afternoon that melted some of the snow. By the time we arrived in Michigan that night, the melted snow re-froze as ice all over the highway. We lost count of the number of cars we saw lose control and end up in the median or off the side of the road. At my parents' urging, we got a hotel room and will continue on this morning when my lazy-ass husband and kids get their sleepy butts out of bed. (8:30 a.m. edit: THEY ARE STILL SLEEPING!) And have some breakfast. We were going to go super-cheap and stay at a Red Roof Inn, but then remembered that there wouldn't be anyplace open for breakfast on Christmas morning. We therefore decided to go with Comfort Inn because they always have a decent breakfast including make-your-own waffles ("And in the morning, I'm makin' waffles!" - name the movie for extra bunny points).

So I hope Christmas morning finds you in the embrace of loved ones in a cozy warm home, instead of an impersonal hotel looking forward to a slippery drive to your destination.

Merry Christmas!!!!


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Monday, December 22, 2008

Mute Monday - T is for . . .











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Friday, December 19, 2008

Another Holiday Treat Recipe

A big favorite at holiday time for us is Rum Balls. They're super easy and SO-O-O-O-O good.

Rum Balls

2 C vanilla wafer crumbs (I just run some Nilla Wafers through the food processor)
2 C powdered sugar
2 C chopped nuts (I use pecans and just run 'em through the food processor)
1/4 C cocoa powder
1/4 C light corn syrup
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 C light rum
1 tsp. vanilla extract

Powdered sugar for coating

Combine all ingredients, crumbs through vanilla. I use a mixer, but you can mix by hand. Shape into bite-sized balls and roll in powdered sugar. Store in a tightly covered container.

Since these are uncooked and the rum retains some potency, I wouldn't recommend them for the kiddos.

Alternatives to rum include bourbon, red wine, or this - a new favorite of mine. You can also omit the cocoa and use a dry white wine, then roll them in coarse sugar (extra large crystals, in the cake decorating aisle at the grocery) instead of powdered sugar.


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Thursday, December 18, 2008

LOL!

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Some folks where I used to live needed no cookbook to accomplish this feat. They were immigrants from an Asian country (yes I know which one, but I won't say so as to not cast aspersions on all immigrants from that country). The local police (from whom I heard the story) were called the immigrants' house regarding a domestic dispute. The officers decided to split up the combatants, so one officer stayed in the living room with the husband while the other took the wife to the kitchen to talk.

Upon entering the kitchen, the second officer was overwhelmed by the smell of blood and scanned the kitchen, coming upon the skinned, partially butchered remains of a german shepherd. Turns out, the family had been quite pleased to find that the local shelters "sold" such fine meat for such low prices. Every month or so, they would "purchase" a large dog at the shelter, kill it, butcher it, and freeze the meat for their meals for the month.

Needless to say, they were advised of the illegality of killing pets in that manner and that American society frowns upon the consumption of household pets. They were not charged, but were advised to check out the local grocery store for fresh meat.

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Wednesday, December 17, 2008

A re-post from last year

Need a last minute snack to take to a gathering or give as a gift? This is easy and SO YUMMY:

You take, waffle-weave/checkboard/square pretzels, like these:

Spread some out on a cookie sheet lined with parchment paper. Place one Hershey's Hug, unwrapped(!), on each pretzel.
Place cookie sheet with Hug-topped pretzel in preheated 170 degree (F) oven for 3-4 minutes, until the Hugs are softened, but not totally melted.

Remove from oven and immediately place one red or green m&m on top of each hug, pressing down just slightly. Place cookie sheet in refrigerator or freezer for a few minutes to re-solidify the Hugs.

You have a sweet and salty treat that everyone will love!! So simple, the kids can even press the m&ms into the Hugs (170 degrees isn't too terribly hot).

You can make them with Kisses too. Just increase the time in the oven to 5-6 minutes. Don't try to do Hugs and Kisses on the same cookie sheet, because they melt at vastly different rates!! I prefer to make these with Hugs because the stripes make it look way too cool. Solid chocolate works but doesn't look as cool.


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LOLs

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Calgary Zoo Display
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Tuesday, December 16, 2008

TMI Tuesday

Click the icon to come play with us!

1. What is the greatest age difference between between and a SO? Older or younger?

Three years, he was younger than me. (The guy below I don't count as an SO)

2. What is the greatest age difference between between and any sexual partner? Older or younger?

He was 20 years older than me and it was a sick, twisted, effed up situation.

3. Have you started your holiday shopping? Is it done?

I've started, but I'm not done. I may not get done either - not much money for shopping this year! Quite a few people on our list will be getting homemade gifts - candy, cookies, jam, etc.

4. What are the chances there will be a "naughty" present under the tree this year (either from you or for you)?

Nada. Nil. Zip. Zero. Zilch.

5. What is your favorite holiday song?

Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer, of course! Okay, not really. I do like Josh Groban's version of O Holy Night and I like Trans Siberian Orchestra's Christmas Canon. To sing I like O Come All Ye Faithful and Silent Night.

Bonus (as in optional):Do you have a preferred time of day to have sex? If so, why?

Anytime is the right time for me!! If I have to choose, I like the middle of the day to dinner time. I have the most energy then.

Friday, December 12, 2008

What up, dawg?

What dog breed are you? I'm a Labrador Retriever! Find out at Dogster.com

Thanks Chris!

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Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

TMI Tuesday

Come play with us!

1. Do you consider sexy underthings a present for you or your partner?

For me, definitely. He doesn't seem to notice, for the most part, so they are for me.

2. What are 3 characteristics of "your type"? Have you best relationship(s) been with your type or when you have gone against it?

Tall, dark hair, and intelligent. My best relationship had two of three (dark hair and intelligence); my spouse has two of three (tall and intelligent).

3. What is on your Santa list this year?

For our Michigan house to sell soon and for a decent price.

4. Generally speaking, who has historically had a higher libido, you or your partner(s)?

ME ME ME ME ME!!!! (Do you read this blog?)

5. The unsculptured female bush seems to have passed from fashion. What about men, do you think they need to trim and shave "down there"?

Yes, manscaping is much preferred to wild and woolly. Doesn't have to be shaved smooth or anything, but trimmed to a manageable level is very nice.

Since we're on the subject, a little more TMI: I decided several months ago to try going au naturel myself - just for a change of pace. It had been so long that I didn't remember what it was like to grow it all out. No shaping, no trimming, nothing. I have officially reached the end of my tolerance for this experiment. It's too long, too out of control. Time to trim the tree = time to trim the bush this year. The breaking point: wearing a pad during my period and having the hair get stuck to the adhesive on the pad. Yeeouch!!! No more. Now where's that razor . . . .

Bonus (as in optional):What are a few of your favorite things (both sexual non-sexual)?
Oral sex (giving and receiving), soft fuzzy bunny rabbits, a vibrator with fresh batteries, oatmeal raisin chocolate chip cookies, a man with a talented tongue, Lindor Truffles, falling asleep with the product of his orgasm drying on my legs (I'm not a "run to the shower" girl), filet mignon, and a man who'll thrill me and then go away.

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Monday, December 8, 2008

Mute Monday - R







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