Head Games

Spousehole got me up early this morning, an hour before my alarm goes off (though I am always up before the alarm goes off anyway). He was screaming at me about having his checkbook, so I showed him that it was right where he left it. Not content to let me be, he then decided to rant and rave at me about spending his money without permission. I was able to demonstrate that every penny I have spent since "budget day" was budgeted and I haven't taken any money from our joint account since the budget withdrawal. Since he couldn't be left having to apologize for dragging me out of bed and yelling at me for no reason, he brought up old issues that should have been laid to rest YEARS ago. All so he could justify being an ass.

I soon found out that this was only the beginning of day's shenanigans. You see, the ring games continue.

He wore his last Friday for his interview, but by Sunday morning it was gone again. I've stopped worrying about it. It is what it is. He uses wearing his ring or not to try to hurt me and I'm done playing that game.

I took mine off in the shower earlier this week, as it tends to come off when my hands are soapy. It's just a bit loose. I put it on the top of the tub enclosure where the children can't see it and can't reach it. Then I forgot to put it back on after my shower. The next couple days I saw it while I was showering, but still forgot to put it back on after I dried off. This morning I planned to make a point of putting it back on after my shower. I didn't take it off as any kind of statement, I just neglected to put it back on for a couple days. I knew where it was and was not concerned about it.

Problem was, when I got to the shower this morning, before the ass crack of dawn since I was up anyway, the ring was gone. I had no real doubt that Spousehole had done something with it. He has done that before. Takes things of mine and withholds them as "punishment" for not putting them away, as if I were a child who leaves her toys out in the rain. For instance, if I leave a watch in the bathroom, he'll take it and say "watches don't belong in the bathroom, do they?" when I either find it or cajole him into returning it to me.

I had to call him about something else and when that was done, I asked him to tell me the whereabouts of my ring. He was silent for a moment, then said he didn't know and asked where I saw it last. I played along and told him where it had been and he claimed he never saw it there. Pointed out that he doesn't wear his glasses in the shower, so he wouldn't be able to see an itty-bitty ring up there. Right. I am way more nearsighted than him and could see it just fine without my glasses or contacts, so I know he's bull-shitting me. That and the silence before he answered. He's a shitty liar.

Later in the day, he emailed me for a password for an account, accusing me of changing the password without telling him. I emailed back with the (unchanged) password and asked if he would now tell me if he had my ring. He never replied.

When he came home, he wanted to know what was for dinner. I said I didn't have time to make dinner because I spent all day looking for my ring (yes, I lied). I asked him to please just tell me if he had it so I wouldn't have to worry about it. He said once again that he didn't have it. I was almost starting to think perhaps he was telling the truth.

He went to bed about 1/2 an hour ago. I checked his coat pockets: no ring. Laptop case: no ring. Backpack: no ring. Maybe he was telling the truth.

One more place - wallet: JACKPOT!

That lying motherfucking son of a bitch. Initially I took both rings, but I put his back in there. I won't stoop to his level.

HNT

No nasty bruises this week! However, I never got around to taking an HNT picture this week, so I just snapped something in the shower this morning. Sorry I didn't plan this out better.

Why do we get half-nekkid? Want to join the fun? See Os at

WTF Wednesday

This week the "W" might be when or why or where instead of what. You can figger it out, rite?

WTF can't my husband remember (1) that it is Wednesday and (2) that Wednesday is trash day? I even reminded him before I went to bed last night!!! I got up around 7 this morning and saw no blue bags at the curb. A quick check north and south to see the neighbors' blue bags and I knew he had once again forgotten. THIRD. WEEK. IN. A. ROW. Do you know how much trash that is in a household with three cats, one child in diapers, and one child who wears pull-ups at night? I recycle A LOT, but we still have A LOT of trash. I bagged it up and put the mountain o' trash at the curb. Then I sent Spousehole an email titled "Guess how I spent my morning" and the following picture attached:He did have the decency to thank me, both by email and in person when he came home for lunch.

WTF would I consider moving to Minneapolis? Yet another headhunter called while he was home for lunch. A company in Minneapolis wants to interview him. He plans to go because he would LOVE to move to Minneapolis. He thinks I would be excited to move there with him because I have family in that area. Guess what? I don't want to move there! See, the woman he has loved for 20 or more years (unrequited) lives there. She is perfect in every way, or so he tells me. I have been compared to the perfect and wonderful Laura from the day I met him. Why in God's name would I want to live anywhere near her? I don't blame her, necessarily, as she has always made it clear that she does not return his feelings. She does, however, take advantage of his willingness to drop everything and go through Hell and high water at her slightest whim. So I guess I do blame her a little. I'm sure her husband would be thrilled to have him there too.

WTF will winter end? I'm sick of it. I slipped on the ice again this morning, but nothing like the previous fall. Municipalities are running out of salt and many have run out of the money budgeted for snow removal for the year. They are saying that they won't have the money to fix the ginormous potholes throughout my city because the pothole-fixin'-money is being blown on snow removal. Frustrating. I'm starting to think that instead of replenishing our savings, our tax refund should be blown on tickets to Florida for a week. What is the point of having relatives with a condo on the Atlantic if we don't take advantage of that from time to time?

TMI Tuesday

1. What do you consider as the greatest thing you've ever done for/ to yourself?

Getting a college education (and beyond). I may not be using it to earn money right now, but having that education is still a precious part of my life.

2. What/ Which part of your life you think you could have done better and why?

Almost everything! If I could do it over, I would have gotten treatment for my depression much, much earlier, I would have chosen a different professional path, and I would avoid some of the mistakes I've made in my marriage.

3. Do you have that one person whom you consider to be the wind beneath your wings?

It's two people for me - my kids. Everything I do is because of and for them. They lift me, give me a reason to keep going.

4. Tell us about your longest relationship.

Do you read this blog? That would be my marriage to Spousehole. We've been together more than 10 years and will have been married 9 years in May.

5. In a relationship, when do you get to that point of enough is enough?

Again, do you read this blog?

Bonus (as in optional):What is that one intimate moment with someone you miss so much and what are you willing to risk to have another moment of it. ;)

I miss looking into the eyes of someone I love and who loves me. That intimate connection when you really love each other and can see and feel it without either saying a word. I'm willing to give up my marriage to have that again.
You thought my answer would be something sexual, didn't you?

Mute Monday - Weird but Good

Try it with eggnog instead of smetana (kind of like creme fraiche)!

I actually have a can just like this in my pantry.

Deep-fried Coca-Cola

Deep-friend Twinkie

Grilled peanut butter & banana sandwich

Taiyaki - a Japanese waffle cake filled with sweetened red bean paste YUM!

Sunday Memes and Stuff

Unconscious Mutterings, the Free Association meme

1. Protocol :: officer


2. Girlfriends :: Boyfriends


3. Shoulders :: sore


4. Coming home :: war


5. Let it in :: cat


6. Honor :: Thy Mother and Thy Father


7. Tyler :: Durden


8. Thriller :: Michael Jackson


9. Angela :: My So Called Life


10. The winner is :: Daniel Day-Lewis

BTW Sunday
~Eat Your Veggies~

By the way...
What's your preference...

green beans or green peas?
Fresh - grean beans
Frozen - either
Canned - peas

carrots or cucumbers?
Carrots

corn or black-eyed peas?
Corn

broccoli or brussel sprouts?
Broccoli, hands down!

potatoes or asparagus?
A close one, but I'll go with asparagus

cabbage or spinach?
Spinach, no question.

zucchini or cauliflower?
Zucchini

radishes or sweet peppers?
Another close one, but I'm going with peppers right now.

______________________

Have you ever played Uno Attack? It's like regular Uno, ramped up a couple notches. Instead of drawing cards, there's a machine that you put in the center of the table and press a button instead of drawing. It may give you anywhere from 0 cards to 7 cards. It makes the game a bit more interesting, because you never know what you're going to get. It also has some different cards from the traditional game, such as one that lets you switch hands with anyone at the table.

Anyway, it's a ton of fun. I've played with my nephew and other assorted people a couple times now. It's way fun, in a family-friendly way. I hope I get one in my Easter basket! (Yes, I still get an Easter basket at age 40. You have a problem with that?)

And what is the deal with Easter being so early this year? I mean, I understand how the religious calendar works, but sheez it's early this year. I mean, Lent started before Valentine's Day! Bad timing. Holy Week and St. Patrick's Day even conflict!

One Answer to a Mystery and a Question for You

Remember a couple weeks ago when Spousehole was wearing his wedding ring again and I was confused? Then when I asked him about it, he took it off again. Well, he had that job interview yesterday and I noticed when he returned from the other side of the state that he had it on again. So I think we can surmise that he put it back on this time to make a good impression at his job interview. Asshole - using this powerful symbol of our marriage to score points in a job interview. It just seems very fake to me.

Question for y'all: If you are or were married, do you (did you) wear a wedding ring? Why or why not?

Oddest Booktitles - Go Vote!

TheBookseller.com is taking a poll of the oddest booktitles this year. Go vote here.

1. I Was Tortured By the Pygmy Love Queen
2. How to Write a How to Write Book
3. Are Women Human? And Other International Dialogues (Catharine MacKinnon - is anyone else not surprised?)
4. Cheese Problems Solved
5. If You Want Closure in Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs
6. People who Mattered in Southend and Beyond: From King Canute to Dr Feelgood