How Fast It All Goes Wrong

I just posted a couple hours ago about how Spousehole can be a good Dad when he tries, among other little things.

Things have gone so, so wrong since that, I don't even know where to begin.

The kids were refusing to eat their dinner. That's a frequent thing around here. Spousehole got angrier and angrier. He tried to force the Boy to eat and threatened to hurt him if he did not eat. I mean, he was came around the dinner table and was in the Boy's face, threatening him with a fork full of food. Yeah, that'll get the kid to eat.

Girl was scared and crying because her Daddy was in a rage. So he turned to her and screamed that she needed to eat too. When he tried to force the food into her mouth, she spit it back out. He hit her upside the head with his open hand.

He HIT my tiny baby. She's not even three years old yet.

While trying to comfort my screaming daughter, I laid into Spousehole. He, of course, turned it all around on me.

I spoil the kids, so it's all my fault. He works hard to provide for us and the kids and I don't do anything to support him. The house is not pristine and the children don't appreciate the food provided by his hard work. No one "respects his authority" (yes, I thought of Cartman too). All we do is disappoint him.

Then the real reason for all his anger comes spewing out. He is about to lose his job (he believes) and there's not a damn thing he can do about it.

First of all, he doesn't know anything for certain. He works for a major government contractor. (No, not Blackwater or Halliburton; but you would know their name if I told you). The team of which he is a part is contracted to a local governmental unit. The contract has been put out for bid and it is quite likely that his company will not win the new contract.

However, what usually happens in these cases is that the company that does win the new contract hires at least some, if not most, of the workers for the previous contract holder. This maintains continuity and ensures that someone in the place knows their ass from a hole in the ground.

But Spousehole assumes that he will lose his job. Never mind that he is a key developer in a vital area. Never mind that the top guy for the governmental unit likes him and respects his work.

So he brings his anger and uncertainty home and takes it out on us.

I told him that we cannot live like that. I suggested he go out somewhere and cool off. I suggested that he consider living elsewhere for the time being if he can't control himself around the kids.

He left, slamming the door behind him. A couple minutes later, while I was clearing the dinner dishes from the table, he came back. He stomped upstairs and closed himself in the bathroom. That's where he is now. I assume he is soaking in the tub. Don't know, don't really care.

He can go fuck himself