TMI Tuesday

Today’s fun TMI Tuesday questions were submitted by Jz from “A Reluctant Bitch” blog. Enjoy!

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Love, Hate, and Guilty Secrets. We never mind telling people about things we love or hate, but how about the things we love, but would hate for anyone to find out about?

Well, it’s time to free yourself of that fear!

For each of the categories below, list one thing you love, one that you hate, and then, take a deep breath and tell us something you hate to admit you love.

Really.
You’ll feel better for it!

1. Food
I love SASHIMI
I hate MUSHROOMS (jock itch = fungus; athlete's foot = fungus; mushrooms = fungus)
My guilty secret is RAW GARLIC

2. Apparel
I love JEANS, I'll even wear them to church when I can get away with it
I hate SLEEVELESS TOPS, if you saw my upper arms you would understand
My guilty secret is GRANNY PANTIES (shut up! they are comfortable)

3. Books
I love BIOGRAPHIES
I hate HARLEQUIN ROMANCES
My guilty secret is (tie) Janet Evanovich books and Fifty Shades of Grey series

4. Songs
I love Vivaldi's Four Seasons
I hate Kesha
My guilty secret is Cheap Trick's Dream Police

5. Movie
I love The Princess Bride
I hate Amelie
My guilty secret is Bridesmaids, 40-Yr-Old Virgin, and the like

6. TV Show
I love HOUSE
I hate most reality shows
My guilty secret is Last Man Standing

7. Celebrity Crush
I love Wes Bentley
I hate Rob Schneider
My guilty secret is Rachel Weiss

8. Music Group
I love Queen
I hate Celine Dion
My guilty secret is Styx

9. Sports Team
I love RED WINGS!!
I hate Broncos
My guilty secret is Blackhawks

Bonus:
Sex Position or Sex Act or fetish
I love OMG, I will take anything I can get these days.
I hate Not getting any
My guilty secret is Gay porn

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

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Paging Dr. House

I am becoming a female Dr. House. No, I didn't go to med school when I wasn't blogging. Yes, I've always been something of a sarcastic, self-centered bitch. The change? I now carry Vicodin everywhere I go and sometimes feel I'm gobbling it down like the leftover Halloween candy.

At the ripe old age of 44, I've come down with shingles. Herpes zoster. Chicken pox - the sequel.

If you have the choice to develop shingles or not, GO WITH NOT. Seriously. If you've had chicken pox, get the shingles vaccine. Your insurance may not pay for it until you're 50 to 60 years old. If that's the case, lobby the insurance company or just knuckle down and pay for it out of pocket (the price is coming down and your local pharmacy may actually have it cheaper than your doctor). Shingles is THAT miserable. You may still develop shingles after having the vaccine, but it will be far less severe than without the vaccine.

Here's the thing: if you've never had chicken pox, you can't develop shingles. If you or your kids haven't had chicken pox, get the chicken pox vaccine. Yes, a parent of an autistic child is advocating vaccines. (Vaccines DO NOT cause autism. Don't listen to Jenny McCarthy)

God, I'm a preachy bitch, aren't I? Sorry. I just really, really don't want anyone to go through this misery. The pain is ridiculous (they thought I had kidney stones or appendicitis until the rash finally appeared, trailing the pain by almost a week). The treatment is no picnic. The anti-herpes drugs can make you nauseous (Valtrex & Vicodin, in my case) and the Lidoderm patches that help immensely are pricey and not always covered by insurance. My insurance covered the patches, but my co-pay for 3 was still $30. Depending on the pharmacy they run $100 to $200 PER PATCH (3x3").

Otherwise, things are not horrible. Marriage remains sexless, but Spousehole has been good to me while I've been suffering. Kids are cute as all get out and doing great in school. Two cats died in six months, but they were older and it wasn't wholly unexpected. Remaining cat is a sweetheart who has really come out of her shell since the boys died. A rabbit fell into our laps soon after cat #2 died, so the cat has a furry friend. A furry female friend who nonetheless likes to mount and hump the poor cat. Hopefully spaying the bun will allow them to remain platonic friends.

What have y'all been up to?

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My Mom, 1941-2010

Not much has changed in my day to day life, hence not much blogging. Same old, same old. Mostly sexless marriage (May 2009 was the last time. Almost 2 years.). Same adorable, but aggravating kids, only bigger.

Well, there was one big change.

My mom died.

No one was expecting it and we're still taking it hard. She died on July 2. Talking to my dad one moment, saying something didn't feel right, and dead the next. Truly it was that fast. She had an abdominal aortic aneurysm and it burst. When that happens, one bleeds out very, very fast.

Of course my dad has had the hardest time, though he tries not to let it show. He's not one to sit around dwelling on things or feeling sorry for himself. But he admits he cries at least once every day still. He'll hear something or think of something and immediately think "I've got to tell Jan that" and then he remembers and his heart is broken all over again. He never, ever expected to survive Mom. Dad is 6 years older and continues to smoke despite having already had a triple bypass and carotid artery disease. His whole life, especially all his retirement planning, involved planning for Mom to carry on without him. It's been all about making sure she would be okay.

But she died as she would have wanted, if not WHEN she would have wanted. Mom's deepest fears were a lingering illness and being in pain. Both her parents suffered greatly before they died and she really, really wanted to avoid that. She got her wish. She beat colon cancer and uterine cancer (cancer-free 17 years) and in the end it was high blood pressure, leading to the aneurysm, that got her. But she didn't suffer and for that I rejoice.

Mostly though, I just miss my mommy.

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Let's Just Jump Right Back In

Wikileaks founder Julian Assange is accused of rape in Sweden. A friend and I have been having a pretty heated debate about whether the facts, as reported, qualify as rape.

Assume the facts are as set forth below. Then tell me if you think either woman was raped, was assaulted in a manner less than rape, or no crime was committed, or whatever your view is, ON THESE ASSUMED FACTS.

Woman1 meets man through work. Is a little in awe of him because of his public position. Invites him to her apartment where things progress to the parties agreeing to engage in sexual intercourse. She says he must wear a condom. He complains and tries to talk her out of requiring a condom. She insists. The parties have sex, with a condom. The condom fails (whether by chance or by the man's underhanded tampering) and the woman's body comes in contact with the man's semen, a occurrence she was specifically trying to avoid.

Woman2 meets man through work. After a couple days of working together, they go out to dinner and she invites him to her apartment. The parties have consensual sexual intercourse, after a negotiation regarded condom usage that results in the man wearing a condom. The parties sleep together, nude, in the woman's bed. In the morning, the woman awakens to the man entering her, sans condom. She does not object, does not ask that he put on a condom
(she says she was aware that he did not have a condom on), and agrees that she at that point consented to intercourse continuing to completion.

Both women later ask man to be tested for STDS or provide evidence of recent STD testing showing him to be free of infection. He declines, having left their country and planning to never see either woman again.

IMO, this man is an asshole. No question. If he has an infection, he obviously should tell them. If he does not or does not know, he should be tested and provide the results. Any gentleman would
do that without hesitation. His failure to do this is stupid and would be illegal in many US states if he was infected with HIV (and sometimes other STDs), knew of the infection, and failed to inform his partners.

Intentionally sabotaging a condom and unprotected intercourse with prior knowledge that a partner objects to unprotected intercourse might be charged as battery by allowing one's bodily fluids to come in contact with a person who objected to such. However, this might be difficult, as any person who agrees to sexual contact with another person, even with a condom, is consenting to whatever contact might occur if the condom fails.

BUT HERE'S THE MAIN QUESTION: Was the second woman raped when she awoke to find her sexual partner from a few hours before entering her, she did not object and in fact consented to the sex act continuing?

Clearly having sex with a completely unconscious person would be rape. But who among us has not had "wake-up" sex? Does it make a difference if the persons are regular sexual partners or have only had sex once?

Please discuss, but keep it polite, 'k?

Yes, I'll post an update on my life soon, thanks for the well-wishes and concerns :-)

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Snowpocalypse 2011!

Dude, it snowed.

Here in Chi-town we haven't gotten the ice that has plagued so many, but we got snow. A couple feet on our driveway and reports of more to come.

I'm going to have to learn to back out of the driveway, because Spousehole only shoveled enough for backing out, not for turning around. Maybe snow bumpers will help keep from hitting the house (again) or neighbor's fence (again).

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HNT - 5 Year Anniversary!

Can you believe HNT has been going for FIVE years now??? Happy Anniversary to all the HNTers out there and especially to Os without whom we wouldn't even have HNT!! Os, YOU ROCK!

In honor of HNT's 5th Anniversary, here is my very first HNT from back in 2007. (I would recreate it for today, but my toes are looking pretty scary right now - been awhile since my last pedicure!)

Now go give Os some love!

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The Root of the Problem

We were told that the basement of our new-to-us house in suburban Chicago was very, very dry. Never a water problem. Ever.
So imagine our surprise Thursday morning, waking up to 4" of water in the basement. The carpet and pad were floating on the water. Spousehole poured water out of the computer case. Worst of all: the poor cats were trapped in the utility room and the fat one couldn't jump up on the washer or dryer because he's SO fat (25 lbs., if you were wondering). He was a very wet baby.

We had a bad storm Wed night/Thur morn and most of the water in the basement was storm water. But not all. There was some "blackwater" too. Ewww.

Eventually it was determined that there was a break in the sewer line somewhere between the house and the road. Wastewater has been draining into the front yard, probably since we moved in last month, but the storm pushed the soil beyond the saturation point and, voila!, a back-up.

They had to dig a trench in the basement and access the line that way. They took out some enormous roots that had pressed down on the clay pipe and shattered it, along with some more roots out near the street that were blocking the line as well. It was a huge mess. It's hard seeing what was your nice comfy family room become a mud-filled disaster zone.

New pipe was laid and we can once again pee, shower, wash dishes, wash clothes, and in all ways dispose of liquids in a sanitary manner. The family room reconstruction will have to wait until everything is dry.

The Rabbit family has been welcomed to Illinois in a spectacular fashion.

To top off my fabulous time, Spousehole is mad at me but I have no idea why. This morning my daughter presented me with Spousehole's wedding ring, saying "Mommy, look what I found!" I hate these little games of his. Sometimes it makes me hate him.

FML

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Well we're moving on up . . .

Up north, that is. Back to where we once belonged. Sort of. After trying very hard to find something here in SC, turning down a couple jobs that would have required big moves, we gave up and Spousehole accepted a position in a northern midwestern state. Not the one where we came from, but not far away.
We're making our way to the hog butcher for the world, tool maker, stacker of wheat, player with railroads and the nation's freight handler; Stormy, husky, brawling, the city of big shoulders. The Queen of the West. Or as Monte Burns once called it "The Miami of Canada" (which always reminds of one of my favorite late, greatTV shows -

Otherwise known as Chicago. Okay Chris and Stephen, not really Chicago, but the 'burbs. Not sure which 'burb yet, since we haven't found a house. So Chicagoland; is that better?

Back to snow. Back to schools not rated the second lowest in the land (SC schools motto: Thank God for Mississippi!). Back to expensive frickin' real estate. Back to houses with basements! (swoon; I never knew I'd miss basements so much).

Guess it's time to change the location setting on my favorite hook-up site . . . which is a big laugh, since I've been very chaste since moving to SC, including within my marriage. Once since I moved here in September 2008. Once. Yeah, that's right: ONCE.

Can you feel the frustration?

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Random Bites

My new favorite fake band name: Dick Durbin and the Smoking Tweets

LOL funny: Tiger's Magical Mistress Tour

Upon hearing about this awful tragedy, my first thought was prayers for the victims and their families. My second thought: there are nightclubs in Siberia?

It's good to know research time and money are being well spent: Study shows it's more painful to rip off a Band-Aid slowly.

Literacy backed as Charleston schools' top job: since this is a new policy, what was their emphasis before?

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Back home and back to the same-old, same-old

The long Thanksgiving weekend was relatively uneventful, having been spent mostly in the Mommyvan driving to and from Michigan. 32 hours in the car over 4 days, plus potty and food breaks, is a little too much togetherness. Spousehole and I were each on the verge of homocide by Sunday night. Kids, each other - we were willing to take out anyone necessary to obtain the peace we sought.

If I never set foot in another McDonald's, I will be a happy, happy woman. I know the kids love it, but I'm willing to sacrifice their happiness.

We're back to 'kids go to school, I hang out at the library, Spousehole talks to potential employers on the phone.' New week, same old thing.

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Easing back in . . .

I get to go home for Thanksgiving! I'm very excited. We didn't make it home for Turkey Day last year and didn't expect to this year, but now we're going! Spousehole has an interview in an adjoining Midwestern state the day before Thanksgiving, so the whole family is going along and heading to Grandma's for turkey, stuffing, etc. My mom is actually not so thrilled. She was thinking she wouldn't cook and she and my dad would just take my nephew and my sister (if she doesn't have to work) out to eat. But with all of us coming, it makes more sense to stay home. I have offered to cook, just using her food, kitchen, etc. but I don't know if she can handle that. If she watches me cook, she'll just feel I'm doing it all "wrong" and try to take over.

I haven't sprung on them that coming home for Thanksgiving means we may not make it for Christmas ($ and all), but I don't really want to think about that either. I've NEVER spent Christmas anywhere but with my family. I realize I'm 42 years old and should really be ready to make some new traditions with my own kids, but wah!, I don't wanna!

In other news, I can't believe I forgot to mention the "procedure" I had done back in September. I had NovaSure done. It's a type of endometrial ablation. It's supposed to reduce heavy periods and between period bleeding. My periods were so heavy that I became anemic and experienced "flooding" sometimes. I also had bleeding every time I had sex. But since the procedure (outpatient surgery) I haven't had any bleeding; none whatsoever. No periods, no nothing. Of course, I haven't had sex to try that out yet*, but I have high hopes. They say that my periods may come back eventually, but will be MUCH, MUCH lighter than ever before. Keep your fingers crossed!!

*Any volunteers to help with that? For purely scientific purposes, of course :-)

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Not Dead Yet

Though there are days . . .

I'll try to sum up the last 6 months or so.

Marriage back to sucking. Not in a good way. And getting worse because -

18 months after moving down here for this job, that they recruited him for (he didn't go looking), they laid him off in October. Budget cuts were ordered, big ones, and his position and many others were eliminated. So he is home all. the. damn. time and we are driving each other crazy. Way too many opportunities to pick stupid fights and get on each other's nerves. This was made worse when -

we all had the H1N1 virus in October. Not pretty and we still haven't shaken the coughs. Spousehole's is the worst and he probably should see a doctor, but -

we have no health insurance. We can't afford COBRA, since after having paid for two houses for almost a year we had very little savings. Some good news (there's not much of it, so pay attention) is -

the house is finally rented out!!! The rent payments just cover our mortgage, taxes, and insurance, but at least that much is covered. What wasn't covered, however, was the problem that led our tenants to call us on Spousehole's last day of work: the furnace died. So on his first day of unemployment, we had to put a new furnace in! (We got two opinions on whether replacement was necessary or if repair was possible. My dad got us the absolute best price from "his guy." Thank God. The other places wanted to charge WAY, WAY more for the same stupid furnace and installation.)

No good segue here. Sorry.

Boy is finally settled in school and is rocking the second grade. He made honor roll for the first quarter. It's like night and day. So he's good with school and school is good with him, but otherwise things aren't so wonderful at the school because -

4 educators were arrested recently regarding allegations of abuse of autistic students at Boy's school. Boy was not one of them, though he was close to the teacher and aide who are accused. It's a mess. But I won't get into that mess. In other school news -

Girl is rocking 4-yr-old preschool. She got into a great school and got a fabulous teacher. All is good there. Well, except that we weren't going to be able to afford it after Spousehole's layoff and were preparing to apply for a scholarship to try to keep her there, but the in-laws' came to the rescue and are paying her tuition. They're not always my favorite people, but they'll do almost anything for our kids. So, in this one instance, they rock too.

The big school fear for us is that it is looking like we will be moving again, so the kids will have to transition to new schools. Girl will be okay, probably, but Boy doesn't transition well. Last year was pretty much a lost year for him as he transitioned to his new school. He's doing so well, we are very distressed about possibly having to move him. Spousehole is interviewing some locally, but the jobs in his particular specialty aren't local. If he takes a local job, he would have to leave his area of specialization. His specialty is in demand, just not here. He would prefer to stay in his specialty and that would be the better move career-wise, but it means moving and that sucks. What also sucks is -

My Mom is on Facebook! Seriously, this is not good. I had to "friend" her, but now I feel like I have to censor what I say. Oh, and my mother-in-law is also on Facebook and I had to "Friend" her too. I really need to figure out the privacy settings on there that allow you to group people and then have only certain groups see certain postings. Ah well. BTW, if you want to be my Facebook friend, shoot me an email (I'm actually checking it again!). If I feel comfortable enough with you (generally if we have had some sort of email correspondence or something), I'll send you my info or you can send me yours. But since my family is on there now, I'm really apprehensive that this blog not be connected to my Facebook (ie, REAL) identity. 'k?

Kids and I spent most of July back home. It was really freaking cold. Not just compared to the South, but compared to normal summers there. I had to go to garage sales and buy the kids coats to wear. It never occurred to me that we would need more than long pants and long-sleeved shirts in JULY. My bad.

My health is better, except for the damn H1N1 after-effects. Blood sugar, blood pressure, and cholesterol all WAY down. I got 90 day refills on insulin and meds before the insurance ended, so I'm good for awhile. Hopefully until Spousehole finds a new position. :-)

That pretty much sums it up.

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Mullet With Headlights

These literal videos are so. darn. funny.

This is Total Eclipse of the Heart: Literal Video Version. Try to not laugh - I dare you.

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Still easily amused . . . all FAIL edition

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Hey now . . .

This can't possibly be directed at me . . . I'm from Michigan!

Go Back to Ohio

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Random Bites

A question for all you sutherners out there: where do the lizards go? That is, when "winter" comes, where do the lizards go? Do they hibernate? Do they hunker down somewhere and lay low until temps go up again? Do they lay eggs and then die, so the lizards that reappear in summer are the offspring of last year's lizards? Do they migrate somewhere? I honestly don't know much at all about lizards. We just didn't have them in Michigan. All I know is that when we moved into this house in September, there were lizards every-freakin'-where and by December there were none. Covering my screen porch, then nuthin'. I assume they'll be back, but I've been wondering where they go. Thanks in advance for the help. :-)


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The kids and I will be spending most of July in Michigan. That's how I'm choosing to deal with the South Carolina summer heat and humidity.


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We celebrated our tenth wedding anniversary at the beginning of the month. My in-laws stayed with the kids and we were able to spend a night kid-free. We couldn't spend the whole weekend, as we had initially planned, because my in-laws arrived on Friday afternoon and needed to leave by noon on Saturday as they intended to be in Maine by Sunday night. There was dinner, there was ice cream, there was a movie, and there was even nookie! That's twice in a year - woo hoo.


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My health is improving. Blood pressure is WAY down and blood sugar is back in a better range. The miracle of modern pharmaceuticals. Better living through chemistry.

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Things I May Never Be Accustomed To In The South

Full-grown adult men with jobs, families, and a mortgage who go by the diminutive form of their name. That is, Billy, Bobby, Timmy, Tommy, Johnny, Jimmy, Davey, etc.

The accents. Especially when emanating from a disciple in an otherwise very professional and well-executed church play. Imagine Larry the Cable Guy as Simon Peter asking "Is it I, Lawd?" It's hard to not giggle. It's like someone from a Tennessee Williams play reading the wrong script.

A "rough" winter having temps that never dip below double digits.

A "rough" winter not involving any snowfall whatsoever.

Gum. What is it with gum down here? Everybody seems to chew gum - all the time, in all places. Men and women, in church, in Wal-Mart, at the symphony. Every. Damn. Where. Not just quiet, unobtrusive chewing either. Big, open-mouth chawing.

Folks who move slow as molasses. O.M.G. Walking, driving - doesn't matter. Tons of people just not in any sort of rush to get any where. Stopping to smell the roses is great and all, but when there are flowers everywhere perhaps bypassing some of is okay, know what I mean?

Full-grown adult non-senior-citizen men wearing seersucker suits. Not in a retro-hipster way, but for real.

The God-awful humidity (and it's only April!)

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I couldn't resist . . .

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Smile

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Condolences

My heart is breaking for another blogger today. The Silent Male's wife passed away Tuesday. She was very young (I don't think 40 yet). Although she had suffered from many health problems, this is a big shock. They are in the process of buying a house and had so much to which to look forward. She leaves her husband, teen daughter and stepson (both 14), and young son (9) to celebrate her memory.

Part of SM's message:

She had been battling illness for years and went peacefully. I want to thank everyone in advance for thoughts and prayers. I won't be available very much over the next few days to say Thank You. She believed in Jesus and I believe she has gone to heaven to meet him in person.

If you are the praying type, please say a prayer for SM and his family. I know he would appreciate it.

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